
Monday, 8 September 2008
Der schönste Ort der Welt

Tuesday, 2 September 2008
Of waste paper baskets, Scottish bronchitis and the Great British experience Part I


The Winton Drive Experience lasted exactly 4 months. As time went by, the first excitement came to an end and the cold harsh Scottish reality set in. I knew it was time to move on when a gangly fellow and best friend of a flatmate who mostly seemed to enjoy excessive exchange of saliva with eager females and who finally discovered his homosexuality 6 years later (if only he had asked me at the time!) decided to move in. Having been outraged about his flatmates' consumption of certain dependence causing substances (weed, as far as I know), he had duly proceeded to inform the University... Needless to say that he was desperate to move, fearing for his skinny neck. (He always strangely reminded me of Sir Hiss.)
Next, I joined the largest halls on offer and moved into a "hostel" of 10, predominantly Scottish students, but chose to spend most of my time in what can only be described as Auberge Espagnole en Ecosse; not a wise idea as I discovered when my latin friends, including a certain Madrilenian with smoulering eyes, went home at the end of that year.
I have to give credit to Glasgow University's Accommodation Office (I think it's a fair comment to say that I befriended most of its staff in my 5 years of dealings with them) for its thoughtfulness in the Scottish, Irish, Norwegian, German and Anglo Russian composition of my second year flat. Whilst my Scottish flat mate became a friend for years to come, I happily embarked on an affaire with our maiden, mature Irish med student flat mate - but then it all went horribly wrong. Our Norwegian friend, who liked to refer to himself as "The Viking", delighted us by cooking caramel, baking bread (during and after which the kitchen looked somehwat like a battlefield) and by consuming oily sardine sandwiches for breakfast. I think it's fair to say that he has become a devout Christian and he has recently married a wholesome lovely American girl, in which order I don't know. Finally, there was the sweet girl with the male Russian first name and the Russian father (a psychiatrist) who used to hum incessantly in a high-pitched monotone voice...Along came the third and without a doubt the most exciting year of my time at university. I had not learned my lesson and instead requested to live with Erasmus students and two very skinny Russian girls who, in the previous year, had endured the smelly feet of their Romanian flatmate, one of the leading world experts in space law I understand...
As well as living with the Russian nymphomaniacs (as it turned out) I shared with two lovely (German and Spanish) Erasmus students. The year began weirdly: unfortunately, living with the two Russians turned out to be rather stressful as one of them, to the sheer amazement of our male flatmates, would prance around the flat, holding her breasts and chasing her female flatmates. One lovely Thursday night in November 2003 I went with my German flatmate and his equally very German The Northface wearing Rastafari friend to the Glasgow School of Art School, where I fell for a Breton.I fell so hard that when the year was over I didn't know how to continue my life without him. We had already met two months before, one enchanted Uisge Beatha night (Pub - Woodlands Road -international student meeting) when he had not asked for my number and I almost forgot about him...